Conversing Care

Tag: Self-Regulation

  • Challenging Negative Thoughts

    Challenging Negative Thoughts

    Overview

    Any one of us can experience negative or unwanted thoughts in our life-time, also known as, “intrusive thoughts”.

    These negative thoughts can have a huge impact on our mood, contributing to self-criticism and feelings of hopelessness.

    If you suffer from reactive mood (a trigger causes intense emotions quickly), challenging your negative thought patterns in a consistent and structured way can improve your mood and impulse tolerance over time.

    Requirements

    If you have a mental health condition or triggers can provoke a mental health crisis, speak to a health professional first before challenging negative thoughts independently.

    Some people may require to practise these types of coping strategies in a safe, therapeutic environment, specially if they have Autism, Bipolar Disorder, OCD or have a Personality Disorder.

    It takes several months with different levels of support networks in order to achieve results from this coping strategy as it is very difficult to perform independently.

    However, the practise alone can have a significant positive impact over time as you become more self aware of your thoughts and how they interact with your mood.

    ✋ Are you struggling right now?

    If you or someone else is feeling unsafe or experiencing suicidal thinking, please visit the Urgent Help page now to find what actions you need to take.

    The Link Between Thoughts, Feelings and Behaviours

    Our thoughts, feelings and behaviours are all interconnected. A negative thought can lead to a negative emotion, which in turn influences how we act.

    For example:

    1. Thought: “I’m going to fail this presentation.”
    2. Feeling: Provokes anxiety and fear.
    3. Behaviour: Procrastinating on preparing / speaking with a shaky voice / avoiding eye contact.

    This cycle reinforces the initial negative thought. By learning to recognise these patterns in thinking, you can begin to challenge the negative thought, reducing the likelihood strong feelings kick in that can then lead you into behaving in an unhelpful way.

    How to Challenge Negative Thoughts

    Challenging your thoughts isn’t about ignoring reality or forcing yourself to be happy.

    It’s about questioning the reliability of your negative thoughts and finding a more balanced perspective.

    Below are some strategies to help get started in challenging difficult thoughts.

    1. Identify Your Thought Patterns

    • Become aware of the thoughts that are bringing you down.
    • Keep a journal to track your negative thoughts, what triggered them and how they made you feel.
    • You might notice common themes, such as:
      1. All-or-Nothing Thinking: Seeing everything in black and white — “If this doesn’t go perfectly, I’ve failed completely”
      2. Jumping to Conclusions: Making negative assumptions without evidence — “My friend didn’t text back, so they must hate me”
      3. Catastrophising: Blowing a small problem out of proportion — “I made a small mistake at work; I’m going to get fired”

    2. Question the Evidence

    Once you’ve identified a negative thought, ask yourself the following questions:

    • Is this thought 100% true? Can you think of any evidence that contradicts it?
    • What’s a more balanced way of looking at this situation?
    • Would I say this to a friend? Often, we are much kinder to others than we are to ourselves.

    3. Reframe the Thought

    Actively replace the negative thought with a more realistic and positive one.

    • Original Thought: “I’m not good enough to get that promotion.”
    • Challenged Thought: “I have a lot of valuable skills and experience. I may not get the promotion but I’ll learn from the experience and be better prepared for the next opportunity.”

    This isn’t about being overly optimistic. It’s about being fair and compassionate to yourself.

    4. Practice Gratitude

    Focusing on the positive things in your life is a powerful way to counteract negativity.

    Keep a gratitude journal and list a few things you are thankful for each day, no matter how small.

    This can help retrain your brain to notice the good things happening around you.

    The Benefits

    Regularly challenging negative thought patterns can lead to significant improvements in your mood and overall mental health:

    • Reduced Anxiety and Stress: By reframing thoughts, you can prevent yourself from spiralling downward.
    • Increased Self-Esteem: Learning to be kinder to yourself helps build confidence and self-worth.
    • Improved Resilience: When you can navigate challenging thoughts, you are better equipped to handle life’s inevitable setbacks.

    Changing deeply ingrained thought patterns takes time and practice. Be patient and kind to yourself throughout the process.

    Remember, you have the power to take control of your thoughts and in doing so, take better charge of your mood.

    Get in Touch

    If eligible, you can contact us for free and confidential emotional support via email and social media.

  • Mood Tracking

    Mood Tracking

    Red rose bush

    Overview

    Everyone experiences emotional ups and downs — it’s a natural part of being human. But when low moods, anxiety or irritability start to interfere with daily life, understanding those feelings becomes crucial. One of the most effective yet simple ways to gain insight into your mental health is by tracking your daily mood.

    It helps you identify patterns, triggers, and emotional cycles. Over time, this self-awareness becomes a powerful tool for managing your mental wellbeing.

    Requirements

    There are several ways you can track your mood and what exactly you’re tracking.

    Traditionally, pen and paper is a good starting point and gives you that flexibility to write freely and track what you want to track.

    What we are seeing more of are Mood Tracking Apps. Most of them are free on App Stores with Subscriptions to access more features. Be aware that some things you want to track might be behind a paywall.

    Mood tracking is a useful tool if you are doing it near daily, over the course of several months. Apps can provide daily notifications to quickly score where you’re at with things.

    ✋ Are you struggling right now?

    If you or someone else is feeling unsafe or experiencing suicidal thinking, please visit the Urgent Help page now to find what actions you need to take.

    How to

    Step 1: What do you want to track?

    There are lots of factors which influence mood.

    As well as naming individual emotions, consider tracking your eating habits, sleeping patterns and daily activities.

    Over time, you will notice how other life-factors impact your mood.

    Step 2: Ask yourself open and closed questions

    • “How am I feeling today?”
    • “What have triggered these emotions?”
    • “Why am I feeling this way?”
    • “Why is my mood better today than yesterday?”
    • “Am I okay (safe) in myself?”

    Step 3: Score your overall mood every day

    For example, 0 being the worst mood possible, 10 being the best mood possible.

    Score your overall mood honestly. When you look back through your tracking, you want to trust yourself that the information you have provided is accurate.

    Step 4: Understanding trends

    Usually, if your depressed for example, your score will be low and flat across most weeks. If you have mood-swings, you will notice highs and lows in your scoring.

    If you are recording your sleep patterns, eating habits and life-events, you will notice your mood will be affected in some way.

    When something happens, don’t expect your mood to change immediately. In some people, feelings and emotions can surface days or weeks later. Those who may have experienced trauma years previously can experience difficulties in mood management years later.

    Download our Free Mood Tracker

    If you don’t know where to begin, our free Mood Tracker PDF can be downloaded and printed.

    Each copy lasts a week and allows you to record your AM and PM mood levels, daily anxiety and irritability levels, as well as how much sleep your getting in hours.

    Conversing Care Mood TrackerDownload

    Additional

    At first, it can be a very difficult to form the habit of tracking your mood. Find a routine you can easily stick to and build upon.

    This coping strategy becomes a more useful tool over time the longer you do it. If you commit for the long-term, you will see long-term benefits.

    If you need some help to begin tracking your mood, we can support you finding the tools you need. Just contact us.

  • Sensory Walking

    Sensory Walking

    Location is Motepark, Maidstone. Grassy fields with river running through.

    Overview

    Sensory Walking is a simple exercise to begin getting in touch with nature and taking notice of different surfaces your walking on.

    This strategy is great for anyone who wants to feel a little more “down-to-earth” and wants to begin getting in touch with the environment and feel a little more grounded.

    Requirements

    Make sure you can trust what you are walking on. There is nothing worse walking barefoot outside and then standing on something which can hurt or damage to the underside of the foot.

    Avoid hard surfaces like concrete paths or tarmac.

    If you have a grassy patch in your garden, that’s perfect to start off with.

    If you don’t have green space of your own, find a local park or field with grass footpaths which is clear of litter and dog poo. No one likes stepping on dog poop with shoes on, let alone barefoot!

    If you have any medical problems with your feet, please ask a medical professional before performing this exercise.

    ✋ Are you struggling right now?

    If you or someone else is feeling unsafe or experiencing suicidal thinking, please visit the Urgent Help page now to find what actions you need to take.

    How to

    • When you go out for your walk and your on a safe surface, take your shoes and socks off and continue walking.
    • Take notice of how it feels to walk on the earth. Can you feel temperature changes? Is the ground wet? How do your feet feel before, during and after?
    • When you have finished your walk or your feet begin to feel uncomfortable, pop your footwear back on after brushing any dirt off of them.
    • Make sure to wash your feet when you get home and make sure your feet are okay.

    Find better ways of coping

    Explore our wellbeing guides and coping strategies to find alternative and healthier ways of coping.

    Visit Coping Tools

    Additional

    We highly recommending walking as a good way to get in your weekly exercise as well as giving your mind that much needed environment change.

    If you are a frequent walker, we highly recommend this strategy because it can enhance your overall experience.

    If this feels uncomfortable to do in public, that’s perfectly normal.

    If you have concerns, begin with taking your shoes off but keeping your socks on. Don’t ruin a decent pair of socks!

    We recommend walking with others you trust.