Conversing Care

Category: Crisis Management

Tools to be used during really difficult times or when you are experiencing a crisis.

  • Suicidal Texts & Messages: What to Say

    This guide will walk you through what to say to someone who is suicidal over text or message.

    It is difficult to receive a text or message when you know the person on the other side is in great distress. This can put a lot of pressure on you.

    We will help you understand how to be a lifeline in this moment and how to engage professional support if needed.

    Remember, you don’t need to be perfect in this situation. Being present and willing to listen and respond to difficult messages is brave enough.

    Proven Basics That Work

    • Take them seriously. Any expression of suicidal thoughts deserves care and attention.
    • Lead with empathy, not solutions. Listening comes before fixing.
    • Be calm and non-judgmental. Your tone can help reduce distress.
    • Encourage connection to help. You can support them and help them access professional care.

    What to Say: Supportive Messages That Help

    Use your own words but these examples can help get you started on a reply.

    1. Acknowledge their pain

    Let them know you hear and believe them.

    • “I’m really glad you told me. It sounds incredibly painful.”
    • “I’m sorry you’re going through this. I’m here with you.”
    • “That sounds overwhelming. Thank you for trusting me.”

    2. Invite them to share more

    Open-ended questions help them feel less alone.

    • “Do you want to tell me what’s been going on?”
    • “What’s been the hardest so far today?”
    • “When did these feelings start?”

    3. Validate without agreeing with hopelessness

    You can validate feelings without validating the idea that things can’t change.

    • “Given everything you’ve been dealing with, it makes sense you feel this way.”
    • “I hear how exhausted you are. Anyone in your situation would struggle.”

    4. Express care and presence

    Remind them they matter to you.

    • “I care about you and I’m glad you’re here.”
    • “You’re not a burden for talking about this to me.”
    • “I’m here to listen as long as you need.”

    5. Gently check on safety

    Asking directly does not put ideas in someone’s head. You need clarity.

    • “Are you feeling safe right now?”
    • “Have you had thoughts about hurting yourself today?”
    • “Are you self-harming at the moment?”

    If they say they’re in danger or you’re unsure, move to the “When to seek urgent help” section below 👇

    6. Encourage support and next steps

    Offer help connecting to others or professionals.

    • “Would you be open to reaching out to someone who can help right now?”
    • “Is there someone you trust who could be with you?”
    • “We could look at options together — like a helpline or text service.”

    Find better ways of coping

    Explore our wellbeing guides and coping strategies to find alternative and healthier ways of coping.

    Visit Coping Tools

    What Not to Say (And Why)

    Certain responses, even when well-intended, can feel dismissive or increase shame. This increases risk.

    • “Everything happens for a reason.” Can minimise their pain.
    • “Others have it worse.” Comparisons invalidate feelings.
    • “Just stay positive.” Oversimplifies difficult feelings.
    • “You should…” or “Have you tried…” Advice can feel overwhelming very early on.
    • Threats or guilt: “Your family would be devastated.” This can increase pressure.

    When to Seek Urgent Help

    If the person:

    • Says they are in immediate danger
    • Has a plan or intent to harm themselves
    • Stops responding after expressing risk

    Act quickly. Encourage them to contact emergency services or a crisis line.

    • If you know their location and believe they’re in immediate danger, contact their local emergency services yourself and explain the conversation you have had with them.

    You can text them something like:

    • “I’m really worried about you. I think getting immediate help could keep you safe. Can we contact [a helpline / emergency services] together?”

    If They Don’t Want Help

    Resistance is common. Stay compassionate and keep the door open.

    • “I get that reaching out feels hard. I’m still here with you.”
    • “What would make it feel even a little safer right now?”
    • “Would it help to just sit together on text for a bit?”

    After The Conversation, Take Care of You

    Supporting someone in crisis can be emotionally draining.

    • Check in with a trusted friend or professional. Make sure you speak to someone too.
    • Set gentle boundaries if you’re feeling overwhelmed. It’s okay to arrange future conversations rather than messages popping out of the blue.
    • Remember: you didn’t cause their pain, and you can’t fix it alone.

    ✋ Are you struggling right now?

    If you or someone else is feeling unsafe or experiencing suicidal thinking, please visit the Urgent Help page now to find what actions you need to take.

    Final thoughts

    Your willingness to listen can make a real difference.

    Even simple, caring messages can help someone feel less isolated in their darkest moments.

    If you’re ever unsure what to do, reaching out for professional guidance — for them or for yourself — is a strong and caring step.

    Immediate Support & Resources

    In an emergency, call 999.

    If you or someone else is experiencing a mental health crisis, visit our Urgent Help page to find the right help at the right time.

    For coping strategies and additional resources, visit the Resource Hub.

    Find ways on How to Talk About Suicidal Thoughts.

    Find out How to Support Someone Who is Having Suicidal Thoughts.

    NHS 111 (Select Mental Health Option)

    • Call: 111 and select the mental health option (Option 2 in some areas).
    • What it’s for: Urgent mental health support, advice and connection to local crisis services. This is a primary point of contact if you’re experiencing a mental health crisis but are not in immediate physical danger.
    • Note: If you are deaf or have hearing loss, use NHS 111 – SignVideo or dial 18001 111 (for Textphone).

    Samaritans

    • Call: 116 123 (Free, 24/7)
    • Email: jo@samaritans.org (Response within 24 hours)
    • What it’s for: Confidential emotional support for anyone experiencing feelings of distress, despair or suicidal thoughts.

    Shout Crisis Text Line

    • Text: Send the word “SHOUT” to 85258 (Free, 24/7)
    • What it’s for: Confidential text-based support if you’re in crisis and need immediate help.

    PAPYRUS HOPELINE247

    • Call: 0800 068 4141 (Free, 24/7)
    • Text: 88247 (Free, 24/7)
    • Email: pat@papyrus-uk.org
    • What it’s for: Support for young people (under 35) struggling with suicidal feelings or anyone concerned about a young person who might be struggling.

    Childline

    • Call: 0800 1111 (The number won’t appear on your phone bill)
    • What it’s for: Free, confidential support for children and young people.

  • How to Support Someone Who is Having Suicidal Thoughts

    It can be incredibly distressing and overwhelming to learn that someone you care about is having thoughts of suicide.

    You might feel a mix of fear, confusion, and helplessness. However, your support can make a profound difference.

    This page provides a template for how to approach and support someone “feeling suicidal” or “having suicidal thoughts”.

    Understanding the Situation: What You Need to Know

    • Suicidal thoughts are a sign of intense pain, not a weakness: People experiencing suicidal thoughts are often overwhelmed by their circumstances and may feel there’s no other way out from the pain they’re in.
    • Talking about suicide does NOT plant the idea: In fact, open and non-judgmental communication can be a crucial first step towards help and navigating a way forward with them.
    • You don’t need to be a Professional Therapist: Your role is to be supportive, listen and help connect them with professional help. Our Urgent Help guide can be used to find the right help at the right time for someone struggling with their mental health.
    • Take all threats seriously. Never dismiss or minimise someone’s expressions of suicidal or high risk-tasking behaviour.

    ✋ Are you struggling right now?

    If you or someone else is feeling unsafe or experiencing suicidal thinking, please visit the Urgent Help page now to find what actions you need to take.

    Immediate Steps: What To Do Right Now

    1. Stay Calm (as much as possible): Your calm demeanour can help ground the person. Take a deep breath.
    2. Ensure Safety:
      • If there is immediate danger (they have a plan and the means): Do not leave them alone. Call 999 or take them straight to A&E. Remove any potential means of self-harm if it’s safe to do so.
      • If there is no immediate danger but they are expressing suicidal thoughts: Proceed to the next steps while remaining vigilant.
    3. Initiate a Conversation: Find a private, quiet space to talk. If you know the person, talk to them as you usually would, keeping in mind you are here to support them.

    How to Talk to Someone About Their Suicidal Thoughts

    There is no easy way around this. If you have genuine concerns around someone’s safety, you need to have the difficult conversation with them.

    Here are some examples to get you started. Remember, be yourself.

    Be Direct but Gentle

    • “I’ve noticed you seem really down lately and I’m worried about you. Are you having thoughts of ending your life?”
    • “It sounds like you’re going through a lot. Have you been thinking of suicide?”

    Listen Actively and Non-Judgmentally

    • Let them speak without interruption.
    • Validate their feelings: “That sounds incredibly painful,” or “I can see why you feel that way.”
    • Avoid sayings, like “Look on the bright side” or “It will all get better.”
    • Show empathy: “I can’t imagine how difficult this must be for you but I want you to know I’m here.”

    Express Care and Concern

    • “I care about you and I want to help the best I can.”
    • “You’re important to me and I want you to be safe.”

    Offer Hope (Gently)

    • “Even though things are overwhelming right now, there is help available and things can get better and change.”
    • “You don’t have to go through this alone.”

    Focus on Solutions and Support

    • “What do you think would help right now?”
    • “Let’s figure out a plan together.”
    • “Shall we speak to a health professional and see what they have to say?”

    Connect Them With Professional Help

    This is critical. You are not expected to solve their problems but to help them remain safe in the moment and line them up with professional help.

    Encourage Professional Help

    • “It sounds like you’re carrying a heavy burden. A professional can offer tools and support to help you through this.”
    • “Would you be willing to talk to a doctor, therapist or crisis team?”

    Offer to Help Them Make Connection With a Professional

    • “Can I help you find mental health support in the area?”
    • “Would you like me to sit with you while you call crisis team?”
    • “I can go with you to your doctor’s appointment if that would help.”

    Know Your Local and National Support Services

    In an emergency, Call 999 or take them straight to the nearest A&E department.

    Great Google Search Terms to Find Help Quickly

    • “NHS mental health services (in your area)”
    • “Local mental health support”
    • “Crisis Hotline”
    • “Suicide prevention”

    Crisis Numbers Provided Below 👇

    What to Do After the Initial Conversation

    • Follow Up: Arrange and stick to talking to them again. A simple text or call can show you still care.
    • Encourage Self-Care: Remind them of healthy coping strategies. Remember the basics of sleep, nutrition, exercise, hobbies.
    • Maintain Boundaries: While you want to be supportive, it’s important not to become their sole source of support. Encourage them to rely on professionals and other supportive relationships.
    • Seek Support for Yourself: Supporting someone with suicidal thoughts can be emotionally taxing, specially over time. Make sure you have someone you can communicate your concerns too.
      • Talk to a trusted friend or family member.
      • Consider speaking with a therapist or counsellor yourself.
      • Remember, you cannot pour from an empty cup.

    Find better ways of coping

    Explore our wellbeing guides and coping strategies to find alternative and healthier ways of coping.

    Visit Coping Tools

    Warning Signs to Look Out For

    While direct communication is key, be aware of these potential warning signs that someone may be contemplating suicide.

    Communication Changes

    • Talking about wanting to die or kill themselves.
    • Talking about feeling hopeless or having no reason to live.
    • Talking about feeling trapped or in unbearable pain.
    • Talking about being a burden to others.

    Social Interaction Changes

    • Acting anxious, agitated or reckless.
    • Withdrawing from social engagements or feeling isolated when with other people.
    • Saying goodbye to friends, family and pets.
    • Significant changes in online behaviour.
    • Showing rage or talking about seeking revenge.

    Physical and Behaviour Changes

    • Looking for ways to harm themselves (buying a weapons or looking for ways to hurt themselves).
    • Increasing the use of alcohol or drugs.
    • Sleeping too little or too much.
    • Displaying extreme mood swings.
    • Giving away prized possessions.

    Remember: You Are Not Alone

    Supporting someone who is having suicidal thoughts is a challenging but crucial act of compassion.

    In an average life time, we will have to support 2 people experiencing a mental health emergency.

    By offering your presence, listening and connecting them with professional help, you can play a vital role in their journey towards healing and recovery.

    Don’t hesitate to reach out for support for yourself. You can’t pour from an empty cup.

    Get in Touch

    If eligible, you can contact us for free and confidential emotional support via email and social media.

    Immediate Support & Resources

    In an emergency, call 999.

    If you or someone else is experiencing a mental health crisis, visit our Urgent Help page to find the right help at the right time.

    For coping strategies and additional resources, visit the Resource Hub.

    Find ways on How to Talk About Suicidal Thoughts.

    Find out How to Support Someone After a Suicide Attempt: A Step-by-Step Guide for Loved Ones.

    NHS 111 (Select Mental Health Option)

    • Call: 111 and select the mental health option (Option 2 in some areas).
    • What it’s for: Urgent mental health support, advice and connection to local crisis services. This is a primary point of contact if you’re experiencing a mental health crisis but are not in immediate physical danger.
    • Note: If you are deaf or have hearing loss, use NHS 111 – SignVideo or dial 18001 111 (for Textphone).

    Samaritans

    • Call: 116 123 (Free, 24/7)
    • Email: jo@samaritans.org (Response within 24 hours)
    • What it’s for: Confidential emotional support for anyone experiencing feelings of distress, despair or suicidal thoughts.

    Shout Crisis Text Line

    • Text: Send the word “SHOUT” to 85258 (Free, 24/7)
    • What it’s for: Confidential text-based support if you’re in crisis and need immediate help.

    PAPYRUS HOPELINE247

    • Call: 0800 068 4141 (Free, 24/7)
    • Text: 88247 (Free, 24/7)
    • Email: pat@papyrus-uk.org
    • What it’s for: Support for young people (under 35) struggling with suicidal feelings or anyone concerned about a young person who might be struggling.

    Childline

    • Call: 0800 1111 (The number won’t appear on your phone bill)
    • What it’s for: Free, confidential support for children and young people.
  • How to Talk About Suicidal Thoughts?

    How to Talk About Suicidal Thoughts?

    Suicidal Thoughts: Where to start…

    If you’re reading this, it means you’re carrying an immense weight. It means you’re bravely seeking a way to articulate the unbearable pain you’re feeling, even the terrifying thoughts of suicide. Just by being here, you’ve taken an incredibly courageous and vital step forward in a new direction.

    Thinking about suicide can feel like being trapped in a dark, silent void. The shame, fear and hopelessness can make it seem impossible to speak out, convincing you that no one will understand or that you’ll be a burden. This isolation only amplifies the pain.

    But here’s the truth: You are not alone in these feelings and you don’t have to carry this burden by yourself. Talking about suicidal thoughts, no matter how terrifying it seems, is the most crucial step towards finding relief, support and ultimately a path to alternative solutions. It’s a sign of immense strength, not weakness, to reach out when you’re in such profound pain.

    This guide is here to help you find your voice. We’ll walk you through why talking is so important, how to prepare, who to talk too, what to say and what to expect. Our deepest hope is by reading this will empower you to take that courageous step towards connection and recovery.

    ✋ Are you struggling right now?

    If you or someone else is feeling unsafe or experiencing suicidal thinking, please visit the Urgent Help page now to find what actions you need to take.

    Why Talking About It..Helps.

    • Breaking the Isolation: Suicidal thoughts thrive in secrecy. Talking about them immediately disrupts that isolation. It lets light into the darkness and reminds you that you are connected to others who care.
    • Validation and Understanding: When you voice your pain, it becomes real and valid. It allows others to acknowledge your suffering and respond with empathy, which can be incredibly relieving.
    • Accessing Life-Saving Help: Talking opens the door to professional help – therapists, doctors, crisis support – who have the expertise and resources to help you navigate these intense feelings and build a path forward.
    • Releasing the Burden: Holding onto suicidal thoughts can be incredibly heavy. Sharing them, even just a little, can provide a significant sense of relief, like taking a huge weight off your shoulders.
    • Dispelling Myths: Many people worry that talking about suicide will make it worse or “give someone the idea”. For the person experiencing suicidal thoughts, this worry can be reversed: you might fear that talking about it will burden others or lead to judgment. The opposite is true. Open communication is proven to reduce risk and lead to recovery.

    Get in Touch

    If eligible, you can contact us for free and confidential emotional support via email and social media.

    Before You Talk: Prepare for the Conversation

    Understand that this is one of the hardest things you might ever do and that makes your willingness to consider it, incredibly brave. Give yourself credit.

    There’s no ‘perfect’ time but choose a moment when you feel a tiny bit of readiness to share, even if it’s just a flicker of hope. You don’t have to be ‘okay’ to talk; you just need to be willing to try.

    What You Don’t Need to Do!

    • Have all the answers: You don’t need to explain why you feel this way or have a solution. Just sharing the feelings can be enough.
    • Be articulate or eloquent: You don’t need perfect words. Short, honest statements are powerful.
    • Worry about ‘burdening’ someone: People who care about you want to know and want to help. Your wellbeing and safety is not a burden.
    • Consider What You Want: What do you need in this moment? To be listened to? To feel less alone? To find professional help? Having a loose idea can help guide you but it’s okay if you just want to talk.
    • Write it Down (Optional but Helpful): If speaking feels too difficult, consider writing down what you want to say in a note, text, or email. This can make the initial step less daunting.

    Find better ways of coping

    Explore our wellbeing guides and coping strategies to find alternative and healthier ways of coping.

    Visit Coping Tools

    Who Can You Talk To About Suicidal Thoughts?

    It’s about finding someone safe, empathetic and willing to listen and help you.

    Crisis Hotlines & Emergency Services

    • When to use: If you are feeling overwhelmed right now and need to talk immediately, or if you have a plan and intend to act on it. These services are available 24/7, are confidential and are staffed by trained professionals.
    • Staffed by trained professionals: Don’t worry how they feel. They are trained to listen to the facts and respond accordingly.
    • You can remain anonymous: With some Crisis Hotlines, you don’t need to tell them your personal details and you can use a different name.

    Trusted Friends or Family Members

    • Think: Who in your life makes you feel safe? Who has shown you consistent kindness and empathy?
    • Consider their capacity: While they care, they might not know exactly what to do or say. Your role is to share your feelings and their role is to listen and support you in finding help.

    Mental Health Professionals (Therapists, Counsellors, Psychiatrists)

    • They are experts: They are specifically trained to help people with suicidal thoughts.
    • Confidentiality: What you share with them is, confidential — with exceptions for immediate danger.
    • They can help you develop a safety plan.

    Your GP or Doctor

    • First point of contact: Your GP can be a great first step. They can listen, assess your needs and refer you to specialist mental health services, medication or talking therapy.
    • Familiarity: You might already have a relationship with your GP or know the buildings location well, making it feel more trusted.

    Spiritual or Community Leader

    • If you have a strong connection to a faith or community, a trusted leader might provide compassionate listening and guidance.

    Conversing Care

    • Our mission is to provide a safe space to chat, connect and find meaning in peer-to-peer and emotional support.
    • One Safe Space we offer is the Community Mental Health Forum. Anonymous support from trained volunteers and community members.

    What to Say: Finding the Words

    You don’t need fancy words. Honesty and simplicity is more than enough.

    Here are some examples to begin a conversation around experiencing suicidal thoughts.

    Be Direct: Using the word “suicide” is okay

    • “I’ve been having suicidal thoughts.”
    • “I’m feeling so much pain that I’ve been thinking about ending my life.”
    • “I’m really struggling and sometimes I think about not wanting to be here anymore.”
    • “I need to tell you something difficult: I’ve been thinking about suicide.”

    Express Your Feelings: Even if you don’t mention suicide at first

    • “I feel completely overwhelmed / hopeless / trapped / empty.”
    • “The pain is so intense, I don’t know how to cope.”
    • “I feel like a burden to everyone around me.”
    • “I just want the pain to stop.”

    Ask for What You Need: (If you know)

    • “I just need you to listen.”
    • “I need help finding a therapist or doctor.”
    • “Can you stay with me for a bit?”
    • “I don’t know what I need but I just needed to tell someone.”

    If you’re worried about being a burden:

    • “I know this is a heavy thing to hear but I feel like I can trust you and I really need to talk.”
    • “I’m struggling and I’m choosing to reach out because I believe you care.”
    • “If this is to much for you, please help me find someone know can help me.”

    What to Expect and What Comes Next:

    A Range of Reactions

    People might react in different ways: some might be calm and immediately supportive, others might seem shocked, scared or even unsure what to say.

    Remember, their reaction is about their own feelings and fears, not about you or your worth. Your job is to communicate, not manage their emotions.

    Relief (Often Immediate)

    Many people report an immediate sense of relief once they’ve spoken about their suicidal thoughts.

    The weight of secrecy can be immense and lifting it is a powerful first step.

    Steps Towards Support and Help

    • Listening: The person you talk to should primarily listen without judgment.
    • Connecting to help: They should help you connect with a professional.
    • Safety Planning: A professional will likely help you create a safety plan – a personalised guide for coping with suicidal thoughts and what to do when they arise.
    • Ongoing Support: This is not a one-time conversation. Healing is a process and ongoing support from professionals and loved ones is vital.

    Confidentiality (and when it might be broken)

    Mental health professionals and Crisis Support Services maintain strict confidentiality.

    However, if you express an immediate plan to harm yourself or others, they are legally obligated to take steps to ensure safety which may involve informing emergency services.

    This is not to punish you but to keep you safe.

    It’s Okay if You Don’t Feel Better Immediately

    Talking is the first step, not a magical cure. You might still feel pain but now you’ll have support and a path towards healing.

    Be patient and compassionate with yourself throughout this process.

    Conclusion: Your Journey Towards Healing Starts Now

    The act of speaking about your suicidal thoughts is a profound act of self-preservation and courage. It’s the first step on a journey towards understanding your pain, finding effective coping strategies and ultimately, reclaiming your life from the grip of despair.

    Healing is a process and it will take time. There will be good days and bad days but every time you reach out, every time you talk, you are choosing life. You are choosing hope. Hold onto that truth.

    You are valued. You are worthy of help and you are not alone. Please, choose to talk. Your life is worth fighting for and there are people ready and waiting to fight alongside you.

    Immediate Support & Resources

    In an emergency, call 999.

    If you or someone else is experiencing a mental health crisis, visit our Urgent Help page to find the right help at the right time.

    For coping strategies and additional resources, visit the Resource Hub.

    Find out How to Recover After a Suicide Attempt.

    Find out How to Support Someone Who is Having Suicidal Thoughts.

    NHS 111 (Select Mental Health Option)

    • Call: 111 and select the mental health option (Option 2 in some areas).
    • What it’s for: Urgent mental health support, advice and connection to local crisis services. This is a primary point of contact if you’re experiencing a mental health crisis but are not in immediate physical danger.
    • Note: If you are deaf or have hearing loss, use NHS 111 – SignVideo or dial 18001 111 (for Textphone).

    Samaritans

    • Call: 116 123 (Free, 24/7)
    • Email: jo@samaritans.org (Response within 24 hours)
    • What it’s for: Confidential emotional support for anyone experiencing feelings of distress, despair or suicidal thoughts.

    Shout Crisis Text Line

    • Text: Send the word “SHOUT” to 85258 (Free, 24/7)
    • What it’s for: Confidential text-based support if you’re in crisis and need immediate help.

    PAPYRUS HOPELINE247

    • Call: 0800 068 4141 (Free, 24/7)
    • Text: 88247 (Free, 24/7)
    • Email: pat@papyrus-uk.org
    • What it’s for: Support for young people (under 35) struggling with suicidal feelings or anyone concerned about a young person who might be struggling.

    Childline

    • Call: 0800 1111 (The number won’t appear on your phone bill)
    • What it’s for: Free, confidential support for children and young people.
  • Squeezing Ice Cubes

    Squeezing Ice Cubes

    Overview

    Squeezing Ice Cubes can be used as a grounding tool to better manage urges of self-harm or suicidal thoughts.

    A hand holding ice cubes.

    Requirements

    Make sure you have lots of ice cubes ready to go.

    Don’t perform this strategy if you have any hand injuries or are sensitive to sudden changes to temperature. If you’re unsure, ask a health professional.

    ✋ Are you struggling right now?

    If you or someone else is feeling unsafe or experiencing suicidal thinking, please visit the Urgent Help page now to find what actions you need to take.

    How to

    • Take a bunch of ice cubes and ideally hold them in both hands over a sink.
    • Simply squeeze the ice cubes in your hands as hard as you can, for up to a minute.
    • This can cause a great deal of discomfort, shock and pain.
    • This discomfort triggers the ‘fight or flight’ in our brains, similar to self-damaging behaviour, meaning you have fulfilled some of that previous ‘urge’ you had. This will hopefully reduce your chances of self-harming in the coming moments.
    • Afterwards, discard the rest of the unmelted ice cubes into the sink and gently dry your hands with a soft towel. Then move on and do something you enjoy like getting involved with an activity or watch some telly.

    Additional

    Most people struggle to squeeze ice cubes as hard as they can for up to 30 seconds. However, those who are in distress usually find up to 1 minute manageable.

    Only squeeze ice cubes up to 2 minutes a round, up to 5 times an hour – then stop and move onto a different coping strategy.

    Ideally, the level of shock from this technique should fulfill some of those negative tendencies and you can safely move on with your day.

    We suggest doing a physical activity afterwards like sport or housework to burn off any excess energy you may have built up during this technique.

  • Band Snapping Technique

    Band Snapping Technique

    Overview

    The Band Snapping Technique is grounding tool to reduce urges of self-harm.

    If you suffer from intrusive thoughts or ‘urges’ of wanting to self-harm, this trick can help stop or at least delay self-harming behaviour in the present moment.

    Rubber band around wrist

    Requirements

    You’ll need some rubber bands or hairbands that fit comfortably around your wrist or ankle.

    We know it can be tempting to wear bands which are tight and leave a mark – but please don’t. This can reduce the effectiveness of the strategy over time.

    This technique works immediately but its effects are short lasting.

    ✋ Are you struggling right now?

    If you or someone else is feeling unsafe or experiencing suicidal thinking, please visit the Urgent Help page now to find what actions you need to take.

    How to

    • Simply wear a rubber band or hairband and every time you are distracted by thoughts or ‘urges’ of wanting to self-harm, just ping the band on yourself.
    • This will obviously sting and hurt – and that’s the point.
    • Instead of actively harming yourself, you are causing pain in a different, more safe way.
    • Continue to ping yourself until you find another distraction, the distressing moment has passed or you can have a face-to-face conversation with someone.

    Additional

    We recommend performing this technique discreetly if in public because there is nothing worse than someone asking you, “what are you doing?”

    We also suggest you only perform this technique in short, sharp bursts. This keeps the shock-factor of the sting without leaving a permanent mark.